Chicago, IL – Questions are pouring in just hours after Rachel London, Managing Editor of The Huffington Post, revealed that the liberal online news aggregator and blog is actually a satire news source.
The announcement was made earlier today when the actual CEOs of the news outlet, infamous right-wing Koch brothers Charles and David Koch, decided to come clean about the experiment. “We can’t understand how people actually believed the Huffington Post articles and blogs over the years,” said Charles Koch. “It baffles me. We thought it was obvious satire with stories like, Could a Small Nuclear War Reverse Global Warming, Five Signs Your Husband May be a Psychopath, Should Christians do Yoga, Anal Tattoos the Next Big Thing, and My ISIS is the Police.”
David Koch said he regrets the experiment to see how stupid Americans are and fears that they have created a monster. “We may have inadvertently empowered the left-wing by training them with misinformation and by satirically writing narratives of injustices where there were none,” said David Koch. “It’s going to take some time to bring people back to their senses.”
Charles and David Koch aren’t just talking the talk about restoring sense – they are walking the walk as well. The Koch brothers have set up a relief fund for free anal tattoo removal and have about 34,500 people signed up for the procedure. They’ve also committed a large amount of funding for restoration after the Baltimore riots and plan to pledge millions to victims of black on white violence.
David Koch apologized for the experiment and called it “irresponsible.” When reporters asked if any other left-wing news sites are actually sister satire sites, both Koch brothers said they had no comment and to talk to their lawyers.